The Missouri Tribulation

Missouri Tribulation- n. a phenomenon unique to the State of Missouri often associated with the desire to move to said state or the actual arrival in said state. This tribulation includes such occurrences as; sickness (chronic and otherwise), broken bones, washers and dryers self destructing, main water lines rupturing etc.; adverse happenings follow quickly upon one another, usually within a matter of days. This phenomenon is sometimes referred to as The Refiner’s Fire.
While the foregoing examples of adversity may seem somewhat mild, an account of more serious events could be given if this author were not afraid to tempt fate. The Missouri Tribulation has been well documented in the lives of many stalwarts who have continued to remain in the State of Missouri and or dream of coming no matter the obstacles.
(A word of caution to those living within the State of Missouri in a time of relative peace; If you offer your home to a fellow sojourner, who wishes to reside in this blessed place, you will be called upon to suffer the Missouri Tribulation with said sojourner.)
Often associated with the Tribulation is another phenomenon marked by increased fierce reliance upon the Lord and his promises. Thereby softening the detremental effects upon the sufferers. Often those experiencing the Tribulation can be found laughing into any gathering storm while tightly gripping their scriptures and their fellow sufferers, much akin to those who choose to sacrifice life and limb by embarking on a very tall, very fast thrill ride with a dubious name such as Cyclone, Twister, or Corkscrew.
To all my fellow sojourners, God be with you. To all of you who have not had the experience, a life is not truly lived until one has ridden the Tribulation and lived to tell about it. Come on out for a visit!